Into Thin Air Read online

  His face starts out blank, but then a tinge of anger breaks through. This isn’t good. I close the door behind him.

  “Did something happen? I really thought you two would hit it off.”

  He crosses his arms and takes a wide stance in the doorway to the living room. “Where were you on Friday night?”

  I stroll to the sofa and fluff the pillows. “I told you, I had a meeting.”

  He huffs. “Why are you lying to me? I saw you with Samuel Moore. Since when is he your client?”

  My stomach sinks to the floor, and I squeeze a pillow to my chest. “Where did you see us?”

  “At the Waterfront. Christy and I walked around after we had a quick bite to eat. I saw you sitting on a bench with him, eating hot dogs. He was wearing a baseball cap.”

  “Did Christy see me with him? I don’t want her telling people at the office.” Not that we did anything wrong.

  “No. I distracted her so she wouldn’t look in that direction.”

  I let out a breath. “Thank you. Sam needed my advice about something. He was here for the weekend to look around and maybe find a place to live. Why is that so horrible?”

  “You tell me. Why did you lie about it? Why didn’t you just say what you were doing?”

  I throw the pillow on the couch. “I could ask you the same thing. Why didn’t you tell me they offered him the position? Don’t tell me you didn’t know. You know how I feel about him, and you didn’t tell me. In some ways, you were lying to me too.”

  He steps forward. “I did it to protect you. I know you’re downplaying your emotions right now. You still think that damn dream was real. Now that he might move here, I’m afraid it’ll make you worse, give you false hope. Spending time with him won’t make your dream real. You’ll only end up hurt and disappointed.”

  My blood boils. “I don’t need your protection, Gale. I’m a grown woman. For some reason, Sam and I click. We both survived the explosion, and maybe that’s what connects us. I wouldn’t expect you to understand because you weren’t there. You’ve never experienced something like we have.”

  “Is this the first time you’ve seen him since you fainted?” He questions me like he’s the lawyer in the room.

  I stand tall. “No.”

  Disapproval flares in his eyes as he clenches his jaw.

  “Cooper came to the office days ago. He went off on me. Sam happened to be there, and he intercepted to protect me.”

  “Why didn’t you tell me about this?” he grumbles. “Why are you keeping everything from me? This isn’t like you. We always tell each other everything.”

  “Because of this.” I wave my hand back and forth between us. “Look how you’re talking to me. You’re not my father. I don’t have to tell you or anyone anything. This is my life.”

  “I’m sorry.” He props his hands on his hips. “But I’m worried like hell. So is your mom. She says you aren’t talking to her as much.”

  “What the hell are you talking about? I talk to her every friggin’ day. As a matter of fact, I should be on my way to her place right now.” I stride over to the shoe rack by the door and fetch my sneakers. One by one, I yank them on.

  “Yeah, but it’s just a basic phone call. She says you aren’t acting like yourself. You’re being very distant, the same way you are with me. You hide in this apartment when you’re not working. When you do visit her, she says you’re like a robot. Pretending to be happy, like nothing ever happened. We both think you need to talk to someone.”

  “That’s your opinion. I’ll deal with this the way I want to. If I want to spend time with Sam, it’s my business and my choice.” I poke my chest with my thumb. “Do you understand?”

  “Do you really think he’s going to turn into the Sam in your dream and you’ll live happily ever after? Have you told him about it?”

  “No, I haven’t said anything. Sam and I believe we have a connection, that there’s something between us. He wants to spend more time with me. I want to figure out who he is and if this bond is real or if I’m trying to form him into someone he’s not. I have to do this for myself.”

  He shakes his head disapprovingly. “You’re setting yourself up, Ellie. Why do you put yourself at risk to get hurt?”

  My eyes bore into his. “Because he’s one hundred and fifty percent worth it,” I declare. “He’s shown me a side of himself like in my dream. I can’t ignore it. I’m willing to be hurt in order to spend time with him.”

  “Doesn’t he have that crazy girlfriend?”

  “Ex-girlfriend. He broke up with her as soon as he got back to LA.”

  “So you’re his rebound.”

  My hand splays by my side, ready to smack him across the face. But instead I keep my cool, even as he continues.

  “I thought you didn’t like to get caught up in this bullshit. You hate dealing with people like this. You get involved with him, you know you’ll get pulled in. There will be no more hiding in the shadows.”

  “Listen, Sam and I hung out this weekend. It doesn’t mean we’re dating. I showed him around Seattle and ended up looking at rental places with him. What does that make us guilty of? Nothing.”

  “But if it were nothing like you just said, why did you lie about it? It should’ve been no big deal to tell me.”

  He’s right. Deep down, I still believe the dream was real, despite all the proof that it wasn’t. I don’t know what I’m expecting to happen. Sam has admitted that he feels something toward me, but could I ever tell him about the dream? If I don’t, would I be lying to him?

  My shoulders droop. “Listen, Gale. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. No one understands what I’m going through. You all expect me to move on like nothing happened. It’s not that easy. I’m questioning everything—even my job. The accident happened weeks ago, and I feel exactly the way I did the moment I woke up in the hospital. Sam is still a part of me.

  “Usually, when people have dreams, they fade. Eventually, they don’t remember them anymore. Mine is so implanted in my head, it hasn’t faded at all. That’s the problem. I think about it all the time. Even more than the explosion. I don’t know how to turn it off,” I admit unwillingly.

  “And you think hanging out with Sam is going to turn it off for you? You know it’ll be the exact opposite.”

  “Do you realize I could have died that day? Don’t you think that can fuck with someone’s head? Why did I survive when those other people didn’t? Why did I fall on Sam’s suitcase when I did? Did it save me? Was this how I was supposed to meet Sam? Maybe he’s my soul mate. Couples meet in the strangest ways. Why not this way?”

  “You’re right. I don’t know half of what’s going on in your head. In a way, I do expect you to forget about it. You’re the one who thinks everything through, gathers facts, and needs proof. This is the one time you have all the proof, but you’re ignoring the facts and going with your heart. All I can say is, I hope it doesn’t bite you in the ass.”

  “Look, keep this to yourself. He’s accepting the contract tomorrow and plans to come back next weekend. I’ll see him again. Where it goes from there—who knows? I don’t want to hear any commentary from you. You’ll have to work with him soon—maybe not directly, but with the team. Please don’t interfere or talk to him about me. He knows you’re my cousin because he saw the picture of us over there on the windowsill.”

  He raises his eyebrows and pulls his head back. “He was in your apartment?”

  I turn away from him and pull on my hair. “Oh my gosh,” I snap. “Do you fucking hear yourself? Now he’s not allowed in my apartment for the two minutes he was here? You’re really pissing me off. I think you should leave.”

  “Wait a second. I’m sorry.” He steps toward me. “You’re right—I shouldn’t have said that.”

  “You shouldn’t have said a lot of things, Gale.” I walk to the apartment door. “This conversation is finished. Whatever happens between Sam and me, it’s my choice, decision, or whatever you want to call it
. Stay out of it.” I open the door. “I should’ve been at Mom’s already. I need to go.”

  “All right. I’ll give you space. But if you need me, you know where I am.”

  I lean my hip against the door but don’t look at him. “Yep.”

  “Say hi to your mom.”

  “Yep.”

  He walks out with his head down, and I slam the door shut. What a mess.

  Chapter 30

  Sam

  It’s official. I’ve accepted the position, and I’ve signed the contract. I’m now the head coach of Seattle University’s soccer team, the Redhawks. LA Galaxy and I will do a live press conference next Monday. I’ll announce my retirement as a professional soccer player, and at the same time, SU will be announcing I’m their new coach.

  I thought I’d be sadder than this. A big part of me is relieved that I’ve finally made a decision. I know which direction I’m going. I look forward to this new challenge and my unknown future.

  This will open up my schedule, which is good. I have to be in Seattle within the next few weeks, so I need to get things in motion for the move. I’m trying not to panic. Everything has to be done yesterday.

  Cass is heartbroken that I’m leaving, but she’s 100 percent behind me. She knows I need a new start. She’s still leery about the situation with Ellie. She throws her opinion in every once in a while, but I ignore her. If I’m honest, though, internally I’m agreeing with her more often than not. At this point, anything can happen when it comes to Ellie and me.

  I sent Ellie a text earlier, asking if she has time to talk. She said she’ll call me in ten minutes. I know I shouldn’t interrupt her during business hours, but I can’t wait. I need to hear her voice. Part of me feels like we’ve continued from our vacation. We talk just like we used to. We’re more personal now. Everything we avoided at the resort is out in the open. When I left her apartment last weekend, I wanted to kiss her so badly, but I kept my distance. It was tough to keep my hands off her all night.

  My phone rings, and I get a thrill because I know it’s her. Stella, say Stella. “Hey there, Stella.” I have to forget the name Ellie.

  “Hi, Sam. Is everything okay? I only have a few minutes. I’m outside, so no one can hear me.”

  “Everything is great. I just wanted to tell you, it’s all final. We’ll do a live press conference next Monday. After that, press releases will go out from both parties. I’ll soon be a resident of Seattle.”

  “I know I’ve said it a million times, but congratulations. How do you feel since you said yes?”

  “Excited. Relieved. Now that it’s a done deal, it feels like the right decision.”

  “Then we need to celebrate. Will you have time when you’re here this weekend? I can make reservations at the seafood restaurant I mentioned.”

  “That sounds great. I’ll go wherever you want. I get in early on Friday. How about Friday night?”

  “Perfect. I’ll take care of everything. I’m so excited for you. I know you’re nervous, but it’s a great opportunity, and you’ll be awesome. Okay. I’m sorry. I really need to go. I can’t wait to see you.”

  “See you soon. I’ll text you when I arrive.”

  “Sounds good. Bye!”

  She’s the reason my decision was easier to make. If she weren’t in Seattle, I don’t know how I’d feel. But it doesn’t matter, because she is.

  Chapter 31

  Ellie

  I’m running late. Christy was in my office for twenty minutes, talking nonstop about Gale. It’s so sweet to hear. They’re going out again tonight. I think that’ll be the third or fourth date. Good for them. Gale and I have hardly spoken since our little spat. I need to call him. It shouldn’t be like this because of Sam.

  I’ve already shut down my computer, and I’ve decided to leave it at the office this weekend. I can’t remember the last time I did that. I actually have enough time to run home and change. I’m supposed to look at an apartment with Sam before we go to dinner.

  My office phone rings. I answer, knowing I’ll probably regret it. “Hey, Dora. What’s up? I’m on my way out.”

  “Sorry, Stella. I have Jenny Parton on the line.” Just when I thought I’d never have to deal with her again, she calls.

  “She asked to speak to me? If it’s about her mom’s divorce, her mom should talk to Stephanie.”

  “She asked for you. I can’t direct her to Stephanie because she left a little while ago for a meeting,” she explains. “Oh. I’m sorry. I forgot to tell you that Stephanie left a message for you to check your emails. You need to respond to one of them before you leave tonight.”

  For Stephanie, a meeting outside the office means she’s left early for a drink. I’ve seen her do this before. The next morning she always comes in a bit ragged looking.

  “Ugh. I wish you would’ve told me sooner. It’s Friday night. Can’t you tell Jenny I’ve left for the day?” I complain.

  “You know how Stephanie is. She always wants clients to be in touch with someone if she’s not available. You should’ve seen her when you were in the hospital. She was mental without you.”

  That’s because I do all her work.

  “I’m not her damn secretary and Jenny isn’t even a client of this firm,” I snarl. “Sorry, I shouldn’t take this out on you.”

  “No need to be sorry. I’d be the same way. Please, just this one time. You know she’ll have my head and yours on Monday if you don’t.” But it won’t be the last time.

  I glance at the clock and sigh. It will be too late to meet Sam at the apartment by the time I’m done now. “Fine. Put her through.”

  I inhale deeply, then exhale. I’m annoyed about Stephanie, but I’m also a little concerned because I’ve seen Sam after he broke up with Jenny. I know I shouldn’t care, but for some reason, I feel like I’m doing something wrong. Sometimes it feels like he cheated on her with me, but that’s because of my dream.

  We hung out last weekend, and the desire to kiss him was off the charts when he left my apartment. It’s difficult not to kiss his full lips like I did so many times in the dream. We did kiss a lot then, but it was because I could show him affection without worrying about who was watching us. Like a normal couple. And then when he tried to hold my hand at the boardwalk—

  The phone rings two times before I pick up. “Stella Crimson.”

  “Hi, Stella, it’s Jenny Parton. Remember me?” How could I forget you?

  “Yes, Ms. Parton. Stephanie has already left for the day. What can I do for you?”

  “I wanted to ask if there’s an update on my portfolio. Did you pass it on to someone at Image Inc.?”

  You have got to be kidding. This is what I have to deal with on a Friday night? I’m not her fucking agent. I pretend to choke myself.

  “Sorry, Ms. Parton. I can’t help you with this. I gave your portfolio to Stephanie. I’m sure she mentioned that at your last meeting with her. I have no idea what she’s done with it since then. She has much more contact with Image Inc. than I do. She’ll have to call you back on Monday.”

  “I’m curious if she remembers I have connections to Samuel Moore. That has to give me a foot in.”

  Of course Stephanie would remember—she didn’t stop talking about him for days after he was here.

  “Have you seen him since the last time we were there? You know we’re moving to Seattle, right?” We’re? Do not answer her questions about him.

  I can’t believe what comes out of her fucking mouth. What a dingbat. It’s interesting how she can lie like this… or is he lying? My defense mode kicks in double time, but I refrain from saying something I’ll regret.

  But what if it’s true, and he’s lied to me from the beginning? I want to confront her, but I have to keep my mouth shut until I talk to Sam. Stay professional, don’t be a jealous groupie.

  “As I’ve said, Ms. Parton, I have no idea what Stephanie has done with your portfolio. You’ll have to take this up with her when she calls you back next we
ek. I’m sure she’s passed it on to someone. However, a company like that receives multiple portfolios every week. It takes time to look through them. If they’re interested, they’ll contact you directly; they won’t go through someone from the law office. Maybe Stephanie can give you contact information for whoever she passed it on to. Or maybe you should send your portfolio electronically. You might get a faster response that way.”

  “I’d rather go through Stephanie then,” she responds with obvious annoyance. “Can you please put me on her high priority list to call back? This is very important.”

  I want to throw my phone across the room. She’s unbelievable. Is the world going to end if she doesn’t become a model? For her, maybe.

  “Will do. Have a great weekend.” I hang up before she can open her fat mouth again.

  Now I need to text Sam that I’ll meet him at the restaurant and that we need to talk. The next task better not be time-consuming. I turn on my laptop again. Right now, I hate everybody, and after Jenny’s call, warning bells are ringing nonstop.

  ∞

  “I’m sorry I’m late,” I say as I catch myself before I fall on my face. Damn new shoes. Hopefully it’s dark enough in here, he didn’t see that.

  He stands up from the secluded corner table and kisses my cheek. It sends very welcome warm sensations, but I pull away. Tonight’s going to be the biggest test of my life.

  “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that. Is something wrong?”

  “As per my text message, we need to talk.”

  His eyes widen. I motion for him to sit down and I follow. “I need to ask you something, and I want the honest truth,” I say through gritted teeth as I fold my hands on the table.

  He pulls his chair closer and leans in. “Okay. What do you want to know?”

  “Are you still with Jenny?” I say it a tad louder than a whisper.

  He draws his head back. “What? Where’s this coming from? I told you we broke up.”

  I lean in closer and mutter, “Well, she called me at the office today. During the conversation, she asked if I’ve seen you and wondered if I knew you were moving to Seattle together. Why would she say that if you broke up? Is she that fu—umm, mental?” I don’t want to swear in such a nice restaurant. “If you’re still with her, I’m leaving right now. I don’t need another liar or the drama in my life.” I push my chair back but regret it immediately because other guests look in our direction.